Human Communication Chapter 10 >> Small group communication

A great deal of our social and professional life will revolve around our participation in group - groups for developing idea, increasing self-awareness, learning, and solving problems. Understanding the nature and function of small group and learning to use these groups effectively and efficiently will help our throughout our social and professional career.

A small group is (1) collection of individuals who (2) are connected to one another by some common purpose, (3) are interdependent, (4) have some degree of organization among them, and (5) see themselves as a group.
A team is a particular kind of small group. as such it possesses all of characteristics of the small group, as well as some additional qualities. Drawing on a number of small group researchers in communication and organizational theory, we can define the team as a small group (1) constructed for a specific task, (2) whose members have clearly defined roles, (3) whose members are committed to achieving the same goal, and (4) that is content focused.

Four type of small groups: 1) Idea-generation groups, 2) Personal-growth groups, 3) Information-sharing groups,  4) Problem-solving groups.

Let's us talk about problem-solving group. It is a collection of individuals who meet to solve a problem or to reach a decision. 

Simple Case:

In order to prepare students for an upcoming achievement test, a small group of students had to be pulled from psychological class once a week on writing skills. Those students were upset that psychological  was their favorite subject, and they didn't want to miss it. The teacher, realizing that she needed "buy-in" from the students, decided it was time to look at the problem from different vantage points. Over the next 40 minute, she deliberately led her students through a dicussion that focused on the different perspectives represented by the six thinking hats. By the end of the period, her students were able to separate the facts from their feeling; had an opportunity to express their disappointment, frustration, and anger; learned how to recognize the positive thing that could come from preparing for the writing exam. They were able to brainstorm ways they could make their tutorial time an enjoyable experience; and were able to summarize what they learned from this experience and to envision ways to use that learning in the future. 

Human Communication Chapter 9 >> Friends, Lovers, Families

Friendship improve happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief. - Marcus Tullius Cicero

Friendship in is an interpersonal relationship between two person that is mutually productive and characterized by mutual positive regard. Let's take a closer look at the components of this definition.

a) Friendship is an interpersonal relationship 

- this mean that communication interactions must have taken place between the people. 

b) Friendships must be mutually productive 

- the qualifier emphasizes that, by definition, they cannot be destructiveness to either of the involved parties. 

c) Friendships are characterized by mutual positive regard

- you like your friend and your friend likes you. Liking people is essential if we are to all them friends.

Romantics relationship: 6 types of love (between male and female)

 1. Eros (love from physical attraction)

 2. Ludus (entertainment and excitement )

 3. Storge (attraction but no passion)

 4. Pragma (concern of benefits)

 5. Mania (loving crazy)

 6. Agape (unconditional love)

Today you hear a great deal about "family", as if there is only one kind of family. Actually, there are many types of families. 

(1) Traditional couples (happy family) - the "traditional" family of a husband, a wife, and one or more children in now just one of many family types. 

(2) Independent couple (more individual) - the relationship is important but never more important than each other person's individual identity. Although independents spend a great deal of time together, they don't ritualize it, for example, with schedules.

(3) Separate couple (not happy but stay together) - live together but view their relationship more as a matter of convenience than a result of their mutual love or closeness. 

Family where life begins and love never ends. 

Family is the most important thing in the world.

The love of a family is life's greatest blessing. 

Human Communication Chapter 4 >> The Self

The self is perhaps the most important element in any form of communication. It focuses on the way in which you and other perceive yourself. The self in Human Communication is who you are and how you see yourself influence not only the way you communication, but also how you respond to the communication of the others. First we'll explore the self: the-self concept and how it develops; self-awareness and way to increase it; self-esteem and ways to enhance it; and self-disclosure, or communication that reveals who you are.

(1) Self-Concept is the image of who you are. The area that affects self-concept: (a) Social Comparison- adjust image & thinking the way society act & thinks. (b) Other images of you- compare ourselves with friends, peers. (c) Self interpretation and evaluation- based on own belief & comprehension. (d) Cultural teaching- belief, attitudes to success the self-concept.

(2) Self- Awareness is the ability discover personal development or from other opinion.
      - open arena (open self)
      - Facade (hidden self)
      - blind spot (blind self) eg: rub nose/ touch face when nervous
      - unknown (unknown self)

Growing in self-awareness: A. listen to other, B. increase open self (share idea), C. seek info about yourself (psychological test), D. dialogue with yourself (intrapersonal)

(3) Self-esteem measure how much you value, respect & feel confident about yourself.
     * over high self-esteem; self-destructive beliefs harm yourself.
Increase self-esteem; a) attack self-destructive beliefs, b) seek out nourishing people (those success), c) remind yourself your success (target), d) secure affirmation, e) work on project thar will result in success.

(4) Self-disclosure is telling your hidden self. Factors influencing;
a. who you are.
b. your culture.
c. your gender.
d. your  listener (small/large group)
e. your topic & channel

Advantages:
- Gain confidence
- Strength friendship
- More truthful about yourself

Disadvantage:
- Lost friends, trust
- Additional pressure, burden
- Living with regret (personal, relationship, professional)

Human Communication Chapter 8 >> Part 2 Interpersonal Communication

What is everyday conversation?  Here are a variety of everyday conversation situations: (1) making small talk, (2) excuses and apologies, (3) complimenting, (4) advice. First, small talk about common, every things, chitchat. Excuses is an explanation or a reason for an action, and then Apologies is saying that you are sorry about something: an expression of regret for having done or said something wrong. Complimenting is something that completes, makes up a whole, or bring to perfection. Advice is an opinion or suggestion about what someone should do. 

Relationship Stage:
A group of students have volunteered to do a role play.
Story was about a girl accidentally hit a man on her way to somewhere (contact). They both apologies to each other and then they exchange phone number (involvement). Soon, they started a date and then they become a couple (intimacy). One day, the man was watching a pretty girl making her girlfriend to be angry and jealous (deterioration). This story have two ending: (1) the man apologies and promise wont make her jealous or angry about the same thing (repair). (2) the man just let his girlfriend think too much then they broke up (dissolution).

Relationship theories:
(1) Attraction Theory holds that people form relationships on the basis of attraction. (2) Relationship Rules Theory is that relationship, friendship and love in particular are held together by adherence to certain rules. (3) Relationship Dialectics Theory argues that people in a relationship experience dynamic tension between pairs of opposing motives or desires. (4) Social Penetration Theory is a theory not for why relationship develop but of what happens when they do develop. (5) Social Exchange Theory proposes that the relationship we choose to create and maintain are the one that maximize our rewards and minimize our costs. (6) Equity Theory, which suggests that people are more satisfied with a relationship in which there is equal give and take by both parties.

Jealous is the Dark Side of Interpersonal Relationship. There are Three type of jealous: 1. Cognitive jealousy is about suspicious thinking, worrying and exaggeration of thing that you think would occur. 2. Emotional jealousy is about seeing someone you like react to something else that is out of your control or reach. 3. Behavioral jealousy is about responses or behavioral changes that takes place with the individual as a result of the envy and jealousy.

Human Communication Chapter 7 >> Part 1 Interpersonal Communication

Interpersonal Communication between sender and receiver; one to another; more than 1 person involved. The essence of interpersonal communication is through conversations.

 

We can get a further perspective conversation by looking at Four principles: (1) turn-taking, (2) dialogue, (3) immediacy, and (4) flexibility.

First, Turn-Taking system is proposed to make sure that there is only one participant who speaks at a time with the minimal gaps and overlaps in each turn change. Turn-taking is considered to play an essential role in structuring people’s social interactions in terms of control and regulation of conversation. And here comes four turns : turn- maintaining, turn-yielding, turn-requesting and the last , turn-denying.

(1) Turn-maintaining cues express a desire to maintain control of the conversation. For instance, we might touch a listener's shoulder or breathe heavily while pausing between sentences to indicate that we are not through talking. (2) Turn-yielding cues relinquish control of the conversation. We might look at the listener more steadily or remain silent for a noticeable period to indicate that we are finished making a point. Turn-maintaining and turn-yielding may also be expressed explicitly. (3) Turn-requesting cues indicate a desire to speak. Nonverbal behaviors that express a desire to speak include direct eye contact, leaning forward, and vocalizations such as "I wondered that myself" or "I understand what you mean." (4) Turn-denying cues deny control of the conversation. For instance, a communication partner might decide to launch into a lengthy description of a recent event. People who wish to discuss something else might stare off into the distance or distance themselves from the communication partner.

Next, Dialogue is a context where two person share messages to one another.Dialogue is indicates an interaction rather than just a conversation - the sender and receiver both actively seek to pursue a healthy and meaningful conversation. 

Last, Immediacy and Flexibility are effective communication and conversation requires both (or all) parties to take into consideration the relationship and intimacy of one another, as well as adjusting to the environment and the context. For example, you host a party at your place - you will invite a lot of friends but some of them do not know one another . So certain topics and conversations would not be mentioned to the ones who are not so close to you. Hence, effective conversation is dependent on the intimateness of one another and the context in which it is in (for example, sharing a joke in a funeral is not a good idea!)